About Me

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Ever since I was a very little girl writing is all I ever had to express myself. I am not one to talk to people; never really had anyone there for me at least not anyone who stuck around. What you are reading here is highly personal; more than you'll want to know about me. . .but it is my link to sanity. . .

Thursday, September 19, 2013

Whew......slacking in so many areas...

I apologize to all and mostly to myself.....I have shamelessly neglected my blog for quite a while....HOWEVER.....it is not because I'm stressed, having bad days or am depressed.  Rather the exact opposite.  Life is AMAZING, GREAT, WONDERFUL & I am happier than I have ever imagined a person could be!  

There is ONE area, relationship, that has me saddened & I have no one but myself to blame for that....I need to force myself to take the time to rectify that.  I know, that sounds harsh...as if this person isn't important enough to me...that I have to 'make time'....That is NOT the case.  There have been some hurts...deep wounds...on both our parts.  Hell some of the reasons for my hurt...I can't quite point a finger to!  Some of it has to do with the length of time I have let pass by without explanations.  I now feel kind of silly, disappointed in my self & embarrassed by my lack of fortitude in attempting to repair the broken pieces.  I have to admit...I'm also a bit afraid of truly losing my soul sister because as much as I love, value, treasure, respect & admire her & our relationship......my family (immediate family - Ryan & our kids) will always take precedence.  It has nothing to do with the whole "I have a man now....I don't need my friends" syndrome...It is and has been accepted that Ryan is a 'family man'...always has been...always will be....I have always been a 'family woman'...just never had a family to focus/concentrate on.  I've had my children & I haven't been anywhere near the greatest role model or at times even a decent mother.....I am finally mentally in a place where I can be that.  Well at least a good role model & a good mom...to ALL my boys & even my daughter!  Because I would rather sit at home and be with my family does not mean I love & care about my friends any less....it is just the way I am 'wired'.....I'm just soooo afraid of losing that close bond because it's acceptable for Ryan to be that way...but for some reason it won't be okay for me....because before I had my family....No one could see that side of me.  Contrary to popular belief...I am always here for my friends....call me (even though I hate talking on the phone) - your troubles are worth my time...as are your accomplishments & happy times.  Email me...text me....I'm not good at reading between the lines & knowing when you need help, a shoulder, an ear or even a hug....I may not run out & be by your side physically...but I AM always here for you....I don't always know what to say or do....I suck with that.  I am very uncomfortable when people I care about are hurting or struggling....I don't know what to say or do...I feel awkward....I don't want to pretend I know your exact pain...I don't want to say the wrong words or do the wrong thing & seem insensitive or make matters worse....but I guess my ways now do the same thing....I am sorry!  I love you Sis!  I value you!  I need you!  I want you (not in a female Broke Back Mountain kinda way either)!  I'm sorry for everything!  I'm sorry to do this in this kind of manner.....heck...when I started this blog entry...I didn't even intend for it to take this turn...it just did....and I'm glad it did though, which is why I'm keeping it...not changing it and am going to post it for you....for me...for the world!!!!

Okay...now that I have rambled on....my intent of this was to acknowledge, apologize for & rectify my Blog slacking.....Peace...Love & Happiness to all!!!!

Thursday, May 30, 2013

My Birthdate Traits by Destiny Astrology

Oh my.....some of this (a LOT) hits the nail right on the head!








May 26 the Birthday of The Solicitous Adventurer
Power Thought...“I am willing to discover opportunities for me to change”
Your greatest challenge is…conforming to your own high standards
The way forward is…to understand that if you don’t live what you preach, others will accuse you of hypocrisy, an accusation which will hurt and offend you deeply.

You’re drawn to people born on…September 24 to October 23
You are both strong-willed individuals who need freedom of expression, and this can create an intense and rewarding union.

Luck maker...Ask for things, don’t demand
Creating luck is about having preferences, not addictions. Addictions are things you tell yourself you must have at all costs; a preference is something that you really want but isn’t vital.

On the surface, people born on May 26 appear to be charismatic and popular but deep down they may dream of breaking away. Publicly they uphold convention, being vocal in their promotion of social values and their concern for others. Privately they tend to be a rebel against restrictions of all kinds.

It may seem paradoxical that for people born on this day it is their own talents, which they can use so effectively on behalf of others, that can impede their own search for fulfillment. If their firmly held beliefs and restless drive for new knowledge and experiences are in harmony, they can be startlingly progressive and innovative. But out of harmony they can result in double standards or impulsive, selfish and intolerant behavior.

The dynamism of those born on this day frequently inspires the imagination and admiration of others—but also their intense dislike. The fierce need these people have to express their individuality manifests in a highly visible struggle within themselves that gives them intense charisma, but can also lead them to disreputable, occasionally dangerous, causes and to unworthy people or situations.

Life may be something of a struggle for these complicated but fascinating people but they are unlikely to want it any other way. Part of them feels that conflict is essential for their psychological growth; in some respects they are right, but they should understand that self-knowledge can be gained during times of peace and contentment as well as times of danger. After the age of twenty-six they may focus on having a strong foundation or home and there are opportunities for them to get in touch with their feelings. They need to make the most of these as, contrary to their beliefs, feeling happy and fulfilled is a distinct possibility for them. Once they are able to gain a more profound level of self-knowledge, they have the potential not just to rise to positions of leadership but to impart their strong views through inspiring words and inspirational deeds.

On the dark side...Hypocritical, rebellious, escapist

At your best...Concerned, warmhearted, decent

Love Commitment-shy

People born on May 26 might talk about the joys of marriage and commitment to one partner, but in their private life they may opt for the single life or for skipping from one relationship to another. They are attracted to people who are as free-spirited and as intelligent as they are, but the best person for them would be someone who has the gentleness to help them open up. They hate to show vulnerability, but vulnerability will, ironically, give them greater strength.

Health Sweet tooth

People born on this day are often moving too fast to be struck down by illness but nervous exhaustion is a potential problem if they can’t find a satisfying way to relax and wind down. They may also be prone to injuries to the arms, hands and fingers, and should avoid smoking or passive smoking at all costs. They do have a tendency to overindulge as far as diet is concerned, and need to find ways to satisfy their sweet and savory tooth in healthier ways; for example, fruit instead of chocolate, nuts and seeds instead of salted chips. Vigorous exercise is highly recommended as it will help them work off some of their pent-up energy in a positive, health-boosting and waist-whittling way. Wearing, meditating on or surrounding themselves with the color orange increases feelings of warmth, physical enjoyment and security.

Career Born politicians

People born on this day love to talk about their views and would make excellent politicians, journalists, teachers, sales persons, and performers. They may need to discipline themselves to avoid scattering their energies, but once they are able to concentrate, their quick mind gives them the ability to succeed in whatever career they choose.

Destiny To influence and inspire others with their charisma and persistence.

The life path of people born on this day is to learn to understand themselves better. Once their words are in line with their deeds, their destiny is to influence and inspire others with their charisma and persistence.

May 26
Signs & symbols
Sun sign: Gemini
Ruling planet: Mercury, the communicator
Symbol: The Twins
Birth date ruler: Saturn, the teacher
*Tarot card: Strength (passion)
Favorable numbers: 4,8
Lucky days: Wednesday and Saturday, especially when these days fall on 4 and 8 of the month
Lucky colors: Orange, navy, yellow
Birthstone: Agate